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War Story - Cesarean Poetry (Angry)

Easy Steps to a Safer Pregnancy - View e-book or Download PDF - FREE!
An interactive resource for moms on easy steps they can take to reduce exposure to chemical toxins during pregnancy.

Other excellent resources about avoiding toxins during pregnancy

These are easy to read and understand and are beautifully presented.

    by Mary Most
    June 94 After her first ICAN meeting

    I wish someone had told me,
    I wish I knew how much the section would hurt
    for weeks, months later.
    My throat closes up just remembering,
    I shudder and get quieter.

    The ICAN meeting was a forum for my feelings
    at last, at least.
    Though I don't see anyone there
    forgiving themselves for this operation,
    this interventive delivery,
    this surgical birth.

    What do you want? A baby. You got one.

    No, more. An image of
    laboring in harmony with the child,
    in a loving helpful embrace with my husband,
    soft music, a gentle cheering section
    of nurses and midwives and doctors
    in clean white gloves handing
    the squirmy grateful puddle
    onto my nurturing breast.

    Not beeping machines and IVs and
    stretched out on this strange cruciform
    each arm reaching to the walls,
    tubes in my spine, and the reflection
    of my own bloody entrails
    in the overhead fixture.
    I'm shivering, so cold, please hold
    my hand, don't go
    away, don't leave me now, they're not
    done with me, I'm lying here
    awake and my body is open
    to the air like some awful hara kiri,
    crucified and

    and you have left me.

    Now the whole room only cares about him,
    why is he crying too
    what are they doing to my baby let me see
    him let me have him let me hold him
    I can't ask with this mask on my face,
    my empty arms strapped down,
    my legs numb I cannot move.
    Why am I here alone, no one left
    to hold my hand and they're putting
    bloody organs back inside me,
    I am open to the wind and so alone

    I don't even have my baby anymore.

    I was just a body,
    these methodical doctors and
    technicians working efficiently,
    coldly, mechanically
    Like a car they could just
    disconnect the battery and close the hood;

    I was not a person.

    I was not a person for weeks, for months.
    Until I closed the door
    on the Room Of Pain, picked up my child,
    and went outside.

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